Actually, back-up, I have a love-hate relationship with the expectations of texting. I believe in setting healthy boundaries upfront.
My potential date prospect is kind of text-obsessed. Every few hours there is a text “check-in,” like “what are you doing?” “Hey doll,” or “Hope you stay warm in this chilly weather!”
For the record, I hate being called a doll, but that’s for another post.
I haven’t gone on a date with this guy, so checking in is pretty unnecessary. I stopped texting back after the “Hey doll” comment and resumed the next afternoon.
Why f*ck up the mystique of getting to know one another in authentic ways, like a date?
I can tell this guy wears his heart on his sleeve because his texts are fast paced, however, there’s no better way than to kill the romance by having a textual relationship.
He says he’s booked all week, which kind of sucks because Andrew is with his dad this weekend.
I want to say something like “why don’t we pick this conversation up on our first date?” but I’m afraid it’s a severe reaction in a virtual-obsessed culture.
To me, a predominant textual relationship means:
- communicating via text every day
- superficial conversations
- asking the same questions repeatedly, like “How’s your day?” or “What are you up to?”
- non-committal date plans
- sharing picture memes
- checking in
- trying to establish a virtual “girlfriend experience” with long answers or complaints
So, what’s the best way to turn a textual relationship into a in-person relationship without seeming aloof or into game playing?