The Case Against Home Cooked Meals From A Single Mom

Yesterday I confessed my guilt that I could only manage one home cooked meal a week. In the good old days, my working mother came home to cook almost every night. My mother responded, “Well, you should make more of an effort because it builds memories.” But the memories I remember was the act of sitting together as a family, not necessarily the cordon blu we were eating.

Studies show that the act of sitting down to a meal with your children is MORE important than making a brilliant meal from scratch.

So with that in mind, all the single moms should release the pressure of making daily home cooked meals if you’re stretched to the limit and instead focus on healthy meals and spending time with you kids.

Parents’ Irregular Work Hours Psychologically Affect Kids

A new study from the Economic Policy Institute is looking at how social class characteristics effect children’s development and achievement to suggest policy changes — found that kids of all ages can suffer fallout when parents are called in for erratic work hours.

For toddlers, that can mean hampered sensory perception, learning and problem-solving skills, and verbal communication.

Young teenagers, meanwhile, are more prone to depression and risky behaviors, such as smoking or drinking, when parents work at night.

The biggest takeaway from the findings is that policy changes and new laws are needed to prevent employers from disregarding the scheduling needs of their workers, especially those who are parents. “Employers should avoid these practices,” Eisenbrey stresses. “When you change a schedule without notice, childcare plans get disrupted or are impossible to even make, especially when it comes to high quality care, which requires regular drop-off and pickup times.”

Doesn’t seem like Amazon would care about this study too much…

Thank You For Picking Up The Slack- But I Still Can’t Stand You

Daycare drama again. Andrew had a slight fever and my sitter called for me to get off work and pick him up. Ahhhh the plights of the single working momma.

I couldn’t possibly leave my meeting that exact second, so I emailed my ex’s mother. My ex picked up Andrew within the hour.

For the first time in over a year, I am so GRATEFUL for his help.

Thank you, seriously.

zazzle.com

zazzle.com

And I still can’t stand looking at your face :-).

P.S. Andrew’s “fever” temperature was completely normal when he got home.

#daycare, #rip-off, #insearchofnewdaycare

On Being a Single Mom

A wonderfully real letter about being a single parent!

5kidsandafarm

Today I feel like I need to focus on the intricacies of being a single mom. I am a single mom of 5. Whether your’e a single mom of 4, single mom of 3, single mom of 2, single mom of 1, or single mom of some other number not listed here… I can relate to just about every emotion you’re feeling.

Before I was divorced, my husband and I were separated for 3 years. THREE YEARS! Crazy, right. I kept hoping and praying things would come back together for us. I prayed, I cried, I went to marriage counseling (alone), I did everything I could do. It was all an illusion. When I finally filed for divorce, he drug his feet to make it even more difficult. He wanted me to be miserable. He wanted me to stay in the marriage and be miserable, even though he wanted other…

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Mothers Rejoice! New Study Proves Quality Time Matters More Than Quantity

stylishlyeverafter.blogspot.com

stylishlyeverafter.blogspot.com

According to a groundbreaking new study, to be published in April in the Journal of Marriage and Family, which found no relationship between the behavior, academic achievements, or emotional well being of a child aged 3-11 and the amount of time spent with a parent — particularly mom.

“When it Comes to Spending Time With Kids, Quantity Doesn’t Matter.”

Bottom line: Don’t worry so much about the amount of time, but what you do when you are together.

Runner Up Worse Thing About Parenting….

…fishing out toddler poop from the bathtub.

I should have saw it coming as Andrew scrunched his little face and passed gas with gusto, loud enough to remind me of my grandfather when he fell asleep in front of the TV. I was running around before bath time, lifting the diaper just enough to see if the other shoe was dropping/had dropped.

It was late. I was tired. The poop wasn’t coming.

So I ushered Andrew into the bathtub per usual, letting him splash and spit water like a squirt gun. And then it happened. Fast and furious, Andrew made his face and grunted loud.

“Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo,” I said (yes, in slow-mo).

I picked up Andrew from the water, dripping above the tub. But I was too late. Small presents floated to the top and then bobbed in greeting.

Seriously. Disgusting.

So baby marketeers- why haven’t you made a baby tub with a net to make a parent’s job easier? Well, I guess that’s my idea, patent pending ;-P

Large-Baby-Tub-0136-        +  salmon_fishing_nets    = genius

Newsweek Special Edition: Your Baby’s Brain

I just bought Newsweek’s Special Edition, Your Baby’s Brain. It is a visually stunning magazine and includes all the learning modules your baby’s brain develops.

Newborn-Brains-500

Some fun facts from the magazine:

  • Studies show that the presence of pets stimulate the release of Oxycontin, which makes pets a possible calming influence for the baby.
  • A fetus has some limited preferences for taste in utero. Sonograms have shown fetuses grimace with the presence of cigarette smoke!
  • Foods high in folic acid, such as oranges, help produce red blood cells and develop the spinal cord.
  • The sound of babies crying changes the brain activity of women, suggesting we are hard-wired to respond to infant cries.
  • Babies enter the word prepared to mimic stimuli as early as three months old.
  • Studies show that babies six months and older will playfully tease each other such as snatch away toys and then hand them back to their playmates.
  • Babies as early as eight months old benefit from lower levels of distress in adulthood with consistent affection, love, hugs and kisses.

Always Late = Motherhood

I was always the one 15 minutes before a meeting. My ass was at my desk right at 8:30 am. I almost never had to call ahead and delay my dinner reservation.

These days, I am ALWAYS late. Even when I don’t have Andrew, I’m still late! Today, I came into work at 9:15am. Tisk tisk.

clockIt’s like Father Time handed me a pink slip as soon as I became a mother, saying “You’re never again going to be punctual as soon as this baby is pooped out.”

Is this a mindset of perpetual lateness to or is it the harsh reality of motherhood? Even my excuses and apologies come a little late.

Curious Question To Mothers: How Much “Me” Time Do You Take?

For my own curiosity, I’m hoping that many of you will take this poll to either reassure or nag me that the amount of “me” time I take is healthy. This unscientific poll can include EVERY kind of mother: Single mom, Single Mom By Choice, Married Mom, Stay-At-Home Mom, Divorced Mom, etc. (however you categorize yourself. I want to be inclusive).

Bad Mommy Thoughts

Every now and then I am overwhelmed with guilt over some of my “bad mommy thoughts.” My internal monologue wars with my son before I realize he’s a year old doing one-year old things. A sampling to hopefully make the blog crowd of moms know their not alone:

  • I can’t wait to drop you off at daycare OR it’s 5:00PM pick up already?
  • You’re sick, AGAIN? Ughhhhhh.
  • Go away. I want to poop in peace.
  • Stay back creature! This is mommy’s pizza.
  • Yes, bang those pots louder so that I can feel my migraine penetrate a hole through my brain.
  • Bedtime is at 7:45 tonight. Reality TV mommy time.
  • The smell of poo in the morning, great…
  • Okay, here’s everything but the kitchen sink to stop that infernal screaming.
  • Puke up on the tile not the carpet!!!!
  • What else can you break today?
  • Who am I anymore? A shell of my former self? A ghost of happiness past?

It’s okay to have these feelings once in awhile. In fact, it’s probably healthy. I love my son, I always will. But I can still bitch about the not-so-fun parental responsibilities.

In my head.

baby mess

MS clip art